Disc 2 starts off inauspiciously as our heroes have been imprisoned by the nefarious Sorceress! What horrors await them at the not-so-tender mercies of Seifer and his electric bed? Is there any hope of rescue from this mobile, subterranean prison, or will its anti-magic field spell doom?
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Well, if you read on, I also went on to say the enemy placement in RPG’s is not important.
Actually yeah, it is. Putting giant caterpillars in the middle of a city is just dumb. In fact, the entire concept of random encounters in a city is dumb. I can’t think of a single other RPG that does that other than FF8.
A one liner can be seen more as an homage.
So that’s your criteria? If you borrow a joke that’s only one line long, it’s an homage, but if you borrow a joke that’s several lines long, it’s “a lift”?
How does that work, exactly?
Thank you, I already know what a Deus Ex Machina is. Yes, it appears to be a pretty immediate obstacle just to prevent them from busting out right then, but you can take certain liberties with the RPG genre, particularly the Final Fantasy series.
Sure, you can do whatever you want. But just because you can do it doesn’t mean it’s a good idea and it doesn’t mean it makes any sense.
I can insert a deus ex machina into any damn thing I want. That doesn’t make it a good thing.
Well… Yes and no. It depends on what the giant drills really DO.
Um, no, it doesn’t. The giant drills serve no useful purpose. A simple underground prison complex would perform the exact same function at a fraction of the cost and be far less complicated to build and maintain.
Face it. The giant drill prison was a stupid idea.
Maybe they sink the prison and move it around every now and again to disorient people who would be planning on breaking out?
Or you could just block out all the windows so the prisoners can’t see outside the prison. Yet again, the exact same function at a fraction of the cost and far less complicated.
Well I’m not sure. Do you live in Galbadia? Are you aware of Galbadian Military Operations and Requirements? Please enlighten me, because I’d LOVE to know. Honestly, why are you acting like the Galbadian Military is somehow an offshoot of the United States Military? They’re completely different, they’ve already been shown to operate differently.
I’m sorry, but exactly what part of “no competent military organization would give prison guards access to weapons of mass destruction” didn’t you understand?
I wasn’t comparing the Galbadian military to the US military. I was using common sense to show that your argument is ludicrous. Once again, NO competent military organization would EVER give prison guards free access to weapons of mass destruction. I defy you to find a single real-life example from any country on Earth of military prison guards being given access to WMDs. You won’t find any, because it just doesn’t happen.
How do you know what kind of keycard system they use? They could be like Shinra and have keycards for every level of their office buildings for god sakes, who knows? Picking on things like this in the first place because they’re “unrealistic” is stupid, because the armies in this game are not subsidiaries of armies and governments in real life.
So it’s okay for the game designers to throw common sense and basic logic completely out the window because “it’s not real life”? I ask again, are you even hearing yourself?
Either the Galbadian military is staffed from top to bottom with raging incompetents or the designers of FF8 had their heads up their asses when they made this game.
But picking on it for not being realistic is a dumb complaint, and you know it.
I’m not picking on the game for being unrealistic. I’m picking on it for making no Goddamn sense and being completely ridiculous.
At least Super Mario Bros. doesn’t pretend to place itself in a semi-realistic environment or a serious story. Super Mario Bros. is the video game equivalent of Looney Toons. FF8 is the video game equivalent of Eragon.
Funny how gh0st get’s criticized for being an FF8 fanboy…
No, Gh0st is getting criticized for being a total tard-burger.
I’m sure he and others would be far more willing to consider your point of view if you’d stop insulting him for no apparent reason other than that you disagree.
I do tend to agree with your points in any case.
Sure, not every little question need be answered, but if a fantasy game creates its own rules and logic, establishing its own little “universe”, it needs to set it up so that there is some level of understanding between the game and the player.
And it just feels like the game does a genuinely awful job at this.
I think maybe the only good thing I take away from this game is the music.
I love video game music. <3
I’ll keep going if you will, but since it seems you can’t refrain from Ad Hominems during an argument, I’ll stop trying to be as civilized with the whole thing.
“Actually yeah, it is. Putting giant caterpillars in the middle of a city is just dumb. In fact, the entire concept of random encounters in a city is dumb. I can’t think of a single other RPG that does that other than FF8.”
Final Fantasy 6. Zozo. Or how about Final Fantasy 7, Midgar? Or how about Final Fantasy 9, Burmecia (I probably spelled that wrong, but whatever)? Think before you say FFVIII is the only RPG that does this.
“So that’s your criteria? If you borrow a joke that’s only one line long, it’s an homage, but if you borrow a joke that’s several lines long, it’s “a lift”?”
Well that depends. Do you think the Irate Gamer is an homage to the Angry Video Game Nerd? Ok, I’m gonna get flamed for that one, but it’s the closest example I can come up with. It’s not borrowing of a single catch-phrase, that can be seen as an homage. It’s a lift of the humor, with effort made to change the music used and everything, not like it’s hard to get the Jeopardy music anyways. Again, I wanna say that I’m not bashing Spoony or his humor in any way, I personally like some of his stuff better than That Guy’s. But this one thing bothers me.
“Sure, you can do whatever you want. But just because you can do it doesn’t mean it’s a good idea and it doesn’t mean it makes any sense.”
Live with it kid, there’s Deus Ex’s in almost every plot here and there. And just so you don’t respond with “Not in any GOOD plot”, I’ll ask you to name one that isn’t a book, and completely free of any Deus Ex. Particularly an RPG, since that’s what we’re on the subject of here.
“Or you could just block out all the windows so the prisoners can’t see outside the prison. Yet again, the exact same function at a fraction of the cost and far less complicated.”
Or it could be a Fantasy game, where the more ridiculous and artistic something is, the better. See FF6 Moving Castle reference, see the construction of several complexes in Final Fantasy 7, most notably with Midgar. Hell, see pretty much ALL of Final Fantasy 9. The point of the games isn’t real life efficiency, it’s stunning artwork and creativity to bring you into a parallel world where everything is more fantastic and overdone. I’d like to just remind you Final Fantasy does not operate completely within bounds of usual logic (see Final Fantasy 4, and being able to walk on the moon with no space equipment at all).
“I’m sorry, but exactly what part of “no competent military organization would give prison guards access to weapons of mass destruction” didn’t you understand?”
The part where you don’t know who the truck belongs to. For all you know, it could have been some level of higher commander visiting the Prison base to see that everything is kept up to standards. After all, Seifer, the Queens Knight, is there. Biggs and Wedge, if i remember right, are there. And they were pretty much the technicians of Galbadia given their fixing of a satellite tower and construction of giant mechanical spider. Would it be any more logical if Quistis suddenly became a computer expert, and hacked into the door to open it ala Final Fantasy 7? Or would you rather fight some kind of large monster and pick the key off them like in most every other RPG? At least this one kinda offers a competent solution to the first key problem.
“So it’s okay for the game designers to throw common sense and basic logic completely out the window because “it’s not real life”? I ask again, are you even hearing yourself?”
I’ll say this again: There are too many unknowns for you to talk about this like it lacks common sense. Does it lack proper explanation? Yeah, but I don’t really dwell on it that much. Once again, for all we know the truck belonged to some higher ups who went to check in on the prison. Inspectors, particularly technicians, would likely have the kind of access to a silo like that. Especially if it actually was Biggs and Wedges truck, since they seem to be pretty much the top 2 engineers of the whole place. The point is, certain assumptions would have to be made to say it makes no sense.
“At least Super Mario Bros. doesn’t pretend to place itself in a semi-realistic environment or a serious story. Super Mario Bros. is the video game equivalent of Looney Toons. FF8 is the video game equivalent of Eragon.”
But what about any of the other games I listed there? Especially Final Fantasy 6’s moving castle, a game that I have suspicions that Spoony likes from his FFVII review? The Megaman X series had a certain level of futuristic realism to it as well, so why that? This is the smallest and most insignificant of nitpicking ever, and there isn’t even good evidence to back any of this up. I can name you DOZENS of good games that have bigger plotholes than that, and I can even name alot of other points in THIS game that have worse plotholes, so it seems very weird to make such a big deal out of a simple KEYCARD found in the back of a truck. It would have made literally no gameplay difference at all if you would have just ran down some Scientists and stole their card. I just don’t see the point of making such a large deal about such a small plot element.
Also, Eragon was a bad mashup/ripoff of about 4 different movies. At least FFVIII made attempts to be unique.
lmao great review as always spoony!
LOL to some of the comments here. I mean, jeez guy’s, relax a little. It’s all in good fun, hell I may not agree with some of the things he says either, but I’m not about to get defensive about them either. I take it for what it is, his opinion of the game. If you can’t handle that then don’t watch the video.
P.S. LOVED the Star Wars and War Games sections XD
First time posting in the FFVIII comments. Although I’ve been keeping up with the videos for awhile, already. Stumbled across Spoony’s site when the FFVIII video was still at the sixth video, I think. Anyway…
I agree with Nenny. WHY SO SERIOUS, GAIZ? Gh0st and mightysamurai both have their points. Gh0st, I admire both your ability to remain civil in the face of personal attacks as well as your grasp on logic and reality, but if you enjoy arguments so much, why not hit up a (debate) forum suited for such things? There will be more people there in the mindset and the mood for a good argument. And mightysamurai, while I agree with your points (to an extent), there’s no sense in resorting to name-calling. Doing so kind of hurts the credibility of your argument. Just like using appropriate grammar and spelling, and being a completely random goofball, there’s a time and place for everything. Even on the interwubz.
Personally, I think this video could have done without the Doctor Insano segment, and I think that the Star Wars segment was a touch too long. They were still amusing bits, though – but I just think that a few seconds shaved from each would have been less disruptive to the flow of the video. A subtle stroke of the brush, if you will.
Otherwise, the rest had me chuckling heartily. I hope to see more of this series of reviews. Otherwise, oh well. SWAT 4 videos are fine, too.
Thanks for the compliment Zealot, but the reason the whole thing actually turned into an argument was a bit unexpected. At first, I was really just posting here so that I could bring up a couple points surrounding FFVIII both as a whole and in this review. But since someone decided to take me up on those points, I had to defend them, and well… you see where it goes from there. Still, I know well the rule of “once you open your mouth on the internet, it becomes open season”, combined with the fairly derogative nature of the first comment, I really should have expected that within the next post or so.
Sorry to turn this place into a battleground of essay-lengthed posts. I just felt that after about 8 or 9 of these videos, I would throw in my two cents.
Just wanted to say, when you give commentary on the story, your rather hillarious, when you rant about the game, you sound like a dick that doesn’t know what he’s talking about, especially since a lot of your points are, “I don’t know” but I’m not here to bash you, I get that, that’s the whole point. It’s funny how you seem to kinda love this game, but its so easy to tear down you do it anyway. Anyway, you’re doing pretty well, just really, the being a dick isn’t actually funny, I just sit through it till you get back to the story.
Not at all, Gh0st. I agree with you, frankly – it’s ironic to see some of the comments bashing on fanboys when the posters, themselves, exhibit certain behaviors often attributed to the fanboys they seem to despise.
lol hahahahah
meanguy ” hey man, is there a whore with you”
rihona “i’m a whore”
suprised you missed a comment for that
Comments: tl;dr. Seem to be a lot of people acknowledging that Spoony is right on the money, but he shouldn’t point any of this out because it’s a Final Fantasy game. Not really seeing how that line of argument works, mainly because it doesn’t.
Anyhoo, good vid, looking forward to the next one, hope more FFVIII fanbois get pissed off.
mightysamurai is right on the money. FF8 is one silly ass game all right.
“Actually yeah, it is. Putting giant caterpillars in the middle of a city is just dumb. In fact, the entire concept of random encounters in a city is dumb. I can’t think of a single other RPG that does that other than FF8.”
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT, A HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.
Yeah this was a joke, right? Right?
I still feel the porgrammers should of went with there original idea for FF8 where you can play as either Squall or Laguna as the main character but yeah….I am not sure if I wanna play a 8 DISC RPG like this just to get more use of the so called zapping system (guy A gets SMG, guy B gets backpack or guy A gets SMG and backpack while guy B gets nothing or guy A get nothing while guy B gets SMG and backpack as featured in RESIDENT EVIL 2) that they also planned. I vaugely remember FF9 but I do remember some lame o moments though and i remember Laguna having a crush on some girl at that part. Yeah Kiros is a guy and I think he was modled after voldo as spoony said but to be more of a male in place of being….uh…difficult to describe Voldo. lol. Anyhoo, about the ‘drill prison’ If I remember right it’s suppose to be a high high high high security prison for those that are like super enemies of the state (like supposedly to not even have a SUPERMAN escape from?) so no one knows where the prison is or where it could be (cuz it moves) and how to break anyone out as I think someone in the game mentioned. the other stuff yeah I know is dumb as far as FF8 goes and I thought the WAR GAMES part at the end of the video was awsome.
PS: WAR GAMES is a classic movie.
dude, this shit is beyond hilarious. i love it. i love you. keep it up.
great review, just wanted to point out that the garage is located on top of the giant drills. so the entire thing might make about 5% more sense.
You are really lonely and you need a girlfriend
But you are great and I like your reviews
“You are really lonely and you need a girlfriend”
Oh, wow. In the face!
Isn’t this for entertainment purpose only? I hope people stop telling you how wrong you are. Even if FF8 was the greatest game ever (what I quite frankly doubt) these videos would still be hilarious.
Sweet video. I love hearing John Belushi singing Jail House Rock at the end.
I agree with RedZealot6 in that I think the Dr Insano bit was too long. I mean, it’s quite funny, of course, but when it gets to the “Ok, you can stop now” point, that’s not a good sign. That’s not an insult, just a heads-up on audience opinion…
I love it when you take the mick out of the storyline! It is really seriously dumb, but there’s still loads of stuff I wouldn’t have taken much notice of otherwise that you take and make funny. Like the Zell-Squall bit. I mean… XD
I too agree about the Insano bit; honestly, it’s like that character is becoming your replacement ‘playing with action figures’ bit. Plus, I know that maniacal laughter can take a lot of breath out of you when you laugh out loud, but could you please work on that instead? The closed-mouth laughter gets a little annoying.
Otherwise, hilarious review! Excellent job on the scene of Zell’s gratitude and with the goof-checking rationality!
4:12
omg… that damage… IT’S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
funny thing when you mentioned about those catepillars turning into butterflies then i remembered the catepillar from Bug’s Life and they do look similar… the torture scene kind reminded me the basement from call of cthulhu DCOTE
One little nitpick I’d like to make: the garage they take refuge in is actually part of the giant drill prison. Once the jail finishes tunneling down to ground level they just get out and take the trucks with them. It makes sense that there’d be military trucks there as well, since it is a high-level government prison for dissenters and political prisoners and so forth.
Of course, they still just happened to pick a truck that had access to a nuclear silo, with spare uniforms in the back, and the previous driver was shit stupid enough to just leave his access card in the glove box. But the garage itself made sense at least!
You should have a junctioning count like the fusebox count
I want to go with my gut on this one…
…but I have to trust the lack of porn.
heh, when I saw kiros here I immediately thought: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH, IT’S JOHNNY, THE HOMICIDAL MANIAC! RUN, OR HE WILL KILL US AAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!” … Hey, anyone who’s read the comic series OR use to have a subscription to some sort of goth magazine knows who Johnny the Homicidal Maniac is and what he does.
P.S. The body count he has racked up is in the dozens if not the hundreds.
Edit: Also, at the electrical torture scene, the way squal was hanging there reminded me of how Jesus was crucified.
Sacrilegious, no?
Could you make a playtrought of Broken Sword? I think it would be a funny review ^^
WAIT, wait… If they don’t have radar, sonar, or radio, THEN WHY THE HELL DO THEY HAVE WIRELESS COMMUNICATION!?
When I played through the game, I’m pretty sure that I saw a few NPC’s (enemies most likely) use wireless transceivers and walkie-talkies. How in the holy mother of lord dang mother fucking shit does that work!?Oh, and if they don’t have any of the three things I mentioned earlier, then they shouldn’t have wi-fi either! Though Noah, it could be worse. You could have gotten a lobotomy and have had the procedure done by Selphie (actually, that’s not a bad idea if you want death to be sentenced upon yourself or another).
P.S. BLACK LISTED (To Quittis, Selphie, and that air headed ass sucking cunt that will eventually become Squall’s girl friend
Coincidently, i named garnet in nine “you slut”
Actually, the Laguna flash backs tell you a lot if you took the time to pay attention. This one in particular, since Raine just so happens to be Squalls mom.
Also, some of the comments on here are just stupid. The prison is built to keep people from the outside breaking out those on the inside. If people can’t find the prison, they can’t break any one out can they?
Also, about the truck, did it ever occur to you that maybe whoever owned the truck had TWO jobs? Hence why he doesn’t have the card key to the missile silo on him, as well as what the truck was doing at the prison.
Most of you are bitching about missing logic, when here I solved two of the arguments on here with common sense!
P.S. Are you guys actually calling the anti magic field Deus Ex? You guys are aware that a lot of RPG’s had anti-magic levels, right?
Why did you not say anything about being able to set the ICBM error ratio? What kind of moron would want to set the error ratio to max? Well maybe…….
Gard 1:Set our nukes to hit this ____, but set the error ratio to max.
Gard 2: why…?
Gard 1: Because we can!
It just hit me – you know who Kiros looks like? Grace Jones. Grace Jones with long braids.
“Slaaaaaaaaaaaave…to the rhythm! Slaaaaaaaaaaaaave…to the rhythm!”
Well done Spoony. Don’t listen to some of these other guys, Insano is awesome.
…And yes, you must ALWAYS trust the lack of porn with that kind of game.
Maybe they just drill into the ground so it would be harder for the prisoners to escape?
Then again, why didn’t they just build the prison underground and not drill-shaped? DOYYYYYYYYY.
Spoony, I love you. You are hilarious. Your ranting on the whole “Anti-magic field” was spot on. Seriously, that’s a load of crap. Keep it up please!
I’d actually assumed the prison was using its inmates for free labor – converting raw materials or something, so the drill design was on big mining/construction site. ::shrug:: Back when I played it, I found the glaring holes to be in the orphanage back story and didn’t take the rest too seriously.
Very funny, and nice Clue references.
wow.
And to think only I once had the thought that Star Wars Geeks and Trekies only fought and insulted each other (Go Star Wars!) but my god.
I’m a fan of FF but you fanboys. You fanboys make our Wars vs Trek seem tame and now thats an acomplishment.
Not just these comments here (god no, this is nothing) but to see and read the length some people go here, on youtube, during conventions, on fansites.
My god. The only other time I see this much work put into anything like debate if a game is good or if VIII is better then VII are Zelda fans trying to put the Zelda games in chronological order.
Erm, are you sure that’s “Laying Pipe” and not “Special Delivery”? XD
Great Video. ;)
Why do they even have an “Error Ratio”? What’s the point? Seriously… Stupid game :(
Spoony great review this my favorite out of your fantasy 8 segments
Hey Cody Spoony finish the game a long time ago he just going back by each segment at a time.
Zell was hugging Squall while on his knee where Squall crotch was. When I first played that thought ran across my head too. That a was joke don’t take too seriously.
About mutated cater”chi”pillars that just nitpicking on things no care about. 1. It a still joke try to keep up 2. werewolf or orcs would still been cooler.
PS. Spoony gave his reason why he thought Kiros was woman for a second, but he guess was a boy. Besides those are not dreadlock they look more like bead hair that a woman would have.
jimmyjoejohn #234 Your logic take such a leap it can easily pass the grand canyon. The FF8 prison is with drill on the bottom to dig underground. Creative yes, cool yes, practical no. According to you in order keep the prison hidden all they need to do is built the prison underground and keep the location a secret.
As for that guy with two jobs theory, nice try, but here 3 reason why it does not work.
1. Why would he need two jobs? To have that high level of clearance in the missle silos or work in maxium prison I would imagine he get enough money.
2. Would he even be allowed to have 2 jobs? I doubt the government would allow someone with that much access to a missles base can get a 2nd job, where s/he surround by dangerous inmates. Imagine someone broke out and attack that person search his wallet. Commuting would be hell if both his jobs are full-time.
3. Could anyone handle two high stress jobs like those? People have broken down in one of them, but your saying he can handle two.
That still miss the point that of all trucks that the gang stole it be the one where he left his keycard. That kind hard to shallow.
changing party members, AGAIN! LOL
no you don’t cody no you dont
“Because porr litaracy is kewl” Linkara
Maybe it’s just me, but there should have been a “Day After” or “Threads” reference during the whole “mess with the nuke launch” sequence. Just all the missles Selphie launches miss Balamb Garden and hitting Shepfield, England and Lawerence, Kansas and all the death and destruction and cut back to Selphie doing that little jumping happy dance of hers because she blew shit up.
But like I said, that’s just me.
Quote:mightysamurai-FF8 is the video game equivalent of Eragon.
And that’s no good.
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